Why I hate my life: Part I

Cleaning is dangerous to your health. It is, I swear. If you want to save yourself, STOP NOW. Just let someone else do it or you’ll end up like me. Flat on your back with kids running around like monkeys while on spring break.
I was cleaning the kitchen yesterday (Gasp! I know!) and was having a grand ‘ol time. Something I don’t normally do is sweep the kitchen AFTER I clean the counters. I figured it needed to be done, so just suck it up and do it. Usually it doesn’t hurt to sweep. Not yesterday! I bent down to sweep the crap into the pan and when I straightened back up, WHAMMO! serious pain stabbing me in the low back. I was surprised and irritated all at the same time. I didn’t have time to be in pain, I had work to do and my lunch was waiting. Then the pain started to radiate. Down my leg. Then I couldn’t lift my leg up to take a step. Crazy I tell ya. By the time I got to my room to lay down, I could barely get in the bed and find a comfortable position. And of course when you are in pain or can’t move well, you have to pee as soon as you lay down! So up I went. WHAMMO!! More pain. I was gasping for breath with each step it hurt so bad. I didn’t think I was going to make it to the bathroom.
I spent the next two hours laying still and trying not to move and 3 Motrin later, I could actually walk across the room. Long story short, I can move around this morning better than yesterday, but as I sit here in the bed writing this, pain is radiating down the backs of both my thighs and my lower back is throbbing/stabbing with pain.
I called the Ortho doc I saw last year who told me of the herniated disk in my L5, S1 and he can’t see me until Friday at 3:45! I’m pretty sure I can make it, but I hope after all the waiting that he can actually do something for the pain. I have a job to go to on Tuesday and I can’t be in pain. Have to lay down flat, so gotta go.